Into the new world: Darkness distilled

“Just close your eyes and ride the roller coaster that is life”

– Zayn Malik –

A new year; a time to say goodbye to the old and hello to the future. This year is particularly important for me as it is my first year at University; one door closes and another opens. But… We have to take the time to remember who we are and what has made us ourselves. Our past, no matter how dark or how “light” it has been will form us as people and if we forget our roots then ultimately we forget ourselves. Which brings me to my text point: who exactly am I and what exactly is my purpose in this world? Well, in short, I’m just a regular (not really) guy who has grown up in this world only to discover that life is full of challenges and we as people need to overcome them. As for my purpose… well, I can’t really answer that just yet. Anyway, let’s reflect on some of the things that have happened in my life that have made me who I am.

I’m Jose; a guy who obsesses (a little too much I think) over a boy band. Ever since I was little, I have enjoyed to sing and while in grades five, six and seven I made it as part of my primary school choir. Then… the big “P” hit me like it hits all of us (it either makes you beautiful or turns you into a potato. Unfortunately, I turned into a potato haha). Ever since then I have enjoyed to sing to myself but never really thought about it seriously. A few friends of mine say I can sing but I don’t really believe them. I think I sound like a frog on steroids when I sing (not that Ive heard or seen a frog on steroids. God, that would be horrifying) yet they keep insisting that I can. I always found that music relaxes my mind and body especially when It’s slowed down. I’ve always been a big RnB person but I also enjoy pop as well as k-pop. I’m probably one of the only guys who idolizes the boy band “One Direction” in Adelaide. They’re looked down upon but I see them as father figures (Until you look at my twitter. Things can get pretty crazy on there, haha.) I’m not a very positive person and during my time at high school, I went though depression, almost taking my own life on numerous accounts. It’s not so bad now but I still feel that way sometimes; I can’t help it. Through music, my sister, a few friends and some very special people that I met on twitter… I was able to stay strong. I don’t really like who I am and anyone can tell you that I self-hate a lot. I’m glad all these things in the past have happened to me and not to anyone else because it has made me into a very quiet and reserved person.

A beautiful friend of mine on twitter by the name of Daphne told me: “I hope you smile today and not just the fake smile I know you do. You think I wont notice when you fake smile but I’ve seen both and I know when your smile is real. It’s because your eyes light up and sparkle a little.” Never have I met someone so kind and caring like her. I’m thankful that we got to meet. She gives me hope everyday. Speaking about friendship, what exactly defines it? Well, I think friendship are bonds in which people are able to share and communicate their feelings with. There isn’t a felling like any other when you’re with your friends. They comfort you when you’re sad and make you laugh again. But… what happens when you split apart? The pain is indescribable. It’s like your heart is being ripped into two by the one who loves you. We need to take a moment to remember that things like these happen for a reason. Once a door closes, many, many more open.

“It’s time to say goodbye to turning tables”
“Next time I’ll be braver
I’ll be my own savior
When the thunder calls for me
Next time I’ll be braver
I’ll be my own savior

 Standing on my own two feet

– Adele –

People come in and out of our lives. Someone who may seem really close to you now may not even remember you in a few years time so… don’t be afraid. Face forward and look towards the future. Let’s jump into the new world together without fear; the darkness in our hearts is distilled and we can see new lights seeping into our lives. It is better to live a life of darkness than live in the light and be ridiculed.

forest-night

Lights may become dull and face away… but we will never forget what has happened in the past…

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